Critical Role, Critters and a whole lotta love

I’ve been wanting to write this blog since I wrote my first one, I’ve been working up to it because it’s gonna get a little personal and I haven’t been totally sure how I wanted to do this. This is largely going to be about Critical Role so first off apologies to my Dad who has just started reading these, I know this content is a little lost on you. Also, apologies as this may get personal and there will be talk about mental health so please feel free to step away now if you don’t want to read. So firstly, who are Critical Role? If you don’t know and you are reading this I suggest you take a look, you can find them on twitter @CriticalRole or #CriticalRole or on Geek and Sundry‘s website. They are voice actors and they play Dungeons and Dragons, Matt Mercer says it better so I’d recommend you go check them out so he can explain himself. It’s OK, I’m happy to wait till you come back. Go on, off you go. So the next thing in the title the Critters, these are the wonderful, talented fans of Critical Role. Honestly the artwork from some of them is mind-blowing, and their love and dedication to the team is phenomenal, you can find them all over twitter hiding in a multitude of places but the best place to find them is #Critters.

Around summer time last year a friend introduced us to Critical Role, he’d found his way to it via the wonderful one-off episode D&Diesel featuring Matt Mercer from Critical Role and yes Vin Diesel. Having then passed it on to us, this lead to a minor obsession from me and my other half, of watching everything Critical Role related we could get our hands on.  Honestly we’d get home from work and just binge watch episodes, I am surprised we even went to work, or out, or saw our friends. We talked non-stop about it trying to get everyone we know watching it, my sister I am pleased to say is now just as hooked. To be fair I still am, I’m going to make it compulsory watching for my new players, I figure it’s a great learning tool and well… who wouldn’t want to watch it.

Around the time we found Critical Role I had taken on some extra responsibilities at work and was pretty much trying to juggle two jobs, and getting messed around because of it. With a history of depression and anxiety, and for someone who has been treated previously for their anxiety, I should have known better and I should have safe guarded my mental health better. Should haves, could haves, hey… perhaps I’ll know better next time. However before I knew it I’d hit a bump in the road of my mental health. As I became unhappier, Critical Role become my focus and become something that my partner and I had together while everything else was a bit shaky. Thank you guys for producing material each week, you gave us something to do together when I couldn’t face doing anything else and you gave us something to laugh at when I stopped laughing at everything else.

The end of 2015/2016 I got very low, let’s just say the bump turned into a crash and by the end of January I wasn’t sure how much longer I could hold on. During this time the one thing my partner could offer as comfort was an episode of Critical Role, a cuddle and his wonderful patience. I have to be honest these are some of my absolute favourite things in the world. During this time my sister made a suggestion inspired by the Wonderful Felicia Day and her book, You’re Never Weird on the Internet, (Almost). After one awful weekend visit, in which the cracks were now outwardly showing – I’d stopped being able to hide it – as she was listening to the audio book on her way home, thinking about what might help, Felicia came to the rescue. She (my sister, not Felicia) wanted to find a way to help me and while listening to the book she had the idea that I should find a creative outlet to help channel myself and more importantly to give me hope, to be the best damn goat herder I can be! (Go read the book and you will understand the goat herder bit.) She said, why not do a book review blog and before I knew it this blog was born. At the same time I just so happened to find my charity work and, more importantly, the healing Critical Role had done inspired me to play D&D again. Somewhere along the way I found my love of being a Dungeon Master, I never thought I was creative and now I have a whole world I have created before me.

So when I say my Dungeons and Dragons campaign is dedicated to Critical Role and the Critters I truly mean it, I would not have this world if it was not for you, I would not have taken the chance and if it wasn’t for the Critters’ online support, with likes and tweets I might not still be doing this. Don’t get me wrong, my family did an awful lot to help me out of a dark patch, they encourage me and believe in me and I tell them daily thank you. This is for the people who don’t know they have helped, who have no idea that meeting once a week to roll dice bought a little bit of light into my world. In addition to finding my way back to D&D I totally hold this all responsible for my ridiculous idea of a 24 hour D&D marathon, that was totally inspired by you guys! If you aren’t sure what I am referring to please do go check out my blog on that D&D Charity Geek – Are you Ready for A D&D Marathon?

These days I take it easy on my mental health and I have greatly reduced my work stress, by just doing one job. Without the stress, anxiety and because now my head is no longer screaming at me, I spend my time thinking about my campaign, my world and all the creatures and beings the players will find. Two things happened yesterday that made me realise I’ve made it a long way done the road.  The first was while food shopping after work with my other half, I was dancing and singing to myself, actually I was singing repetitively ‘Critical Role to London, Hey!’ He asked me what had got into me, and what was wrong with me. I replied that I was in a good mood and he joked he’d forgotten what it looked like to see me happy, it had been so long, that made me realise it really had. Then, last night while lying in bed, my other half (who also plays in my campaign) was worrying about what happens if the team don’t want to take the side plots I’d planned, what happens if they think they are on a time limit to defeat the bad. He made the suggestion that perhaps I could make up an NPC who can guide and reassure them, I responded with ‘don’t worry I already have NPC’s planned for all eventualities’ to which he replied ‘you really are a natural born DM’. This is probably the sweetest thing he could say, after all he knows what being a DM means to me.

And on a side note I really do have the NPC’s planned I really want to tell you about them but major spoilers as I think Keridanyth and Kuruk might be reading this.

So, once again, thank you to the community out there, and as the final bit of the title says, a whole lotta love to you all. Of course my family too, you know that and it goes without saying, but there’s room for more in the family surely? Like only all of the Critter community out there.